It’s that time of year when flowers and chocolates fill the streets, and stores and offices are adorned with pink and red hearts. While Valentine’s Day celebrates all kinds of love, it’s a particularly special day for couples to renew their affection and flaunt their #RelationshipGoals.
In my view, one essential relationship goal is achieving financial stability together. Whether you're still dating or already married, managing finances wisely can provide a strong foundation for a couple’s future—and for the family they may one day build. Well-planned finances can pave the way for shared dreams, peace of mind, and long-term security.
My wife and I strongly believe that our financial standing right now is mainly caused by the decisions that we made in the past. It wasn’t our choice whether we were born rich or poor. But we were given the choice to decide what we wanted to do with our lives. Whether we struggle financially or enjoy a life of luxury, it is all up to us to decide how we want to move forward.
One might wonder: Is financial stability the only key to a strong relationship? Certainly not, but it can play an important role. An American study found that financial stress is a major factor in many divorces, with couples citing money-related arguments as a source of exhaustion and tension in the relationship, even if not the primary cause of separation.
Moreover, financial stability plays a key role in decisions about relationships. In a study about how debt impacts young adults’ choice on cohabitation and marriage, it was revealed that adults are more likely to cohabit if they have significant debt but prefer to marry if they are financially secure or debt-free.
As mentioned, while money is not the leading cause of separation, it can create stress which may lead to the end of a relationship. Now, I'm no love expert, but I have learned a great deal about maintaining a strong and lasting marriage with my wife. One of which is to always work as a team, notably in managing our finances. Here are some things I can share with you on how we stay on track of our financial journey.
- Use financial management tools
Take time to learn tools that can help you track expenses and reach your financial goals. You can make use of MS Excel or other desktop applications. Nowadays, there are also a wide variety of user-friendly financial management applications that are accessible even on mobile phones.
At the beginning of the year, my wife and I create a cashflow projection in MS Excel. We plot the anticipated income and expenses that we could earn or incur in the coming months. We also consider in our budget the expenses on upcoming celebrations and planned vacations. At the end of each month, we make a variance analysis and understand why our actual expenses are higher than what we’ve initially budgeted and make the necessary adjustments to next month’s budget.
Regardless of the application you choose, I think what’s critically important is for you to consistently update the tool.
- Maximize the power of banks
Couples can make the most of their bank accounts and financial services by using a variety of tools and strategies to manage their finances efficiently. Here’s how banks can help you in these aspects:
Budgeting and financial planning
Opening a joint account is one way for couples to start achieving their short-term and long-term financial goals. Not only will it limit you from spending too much on yourself, but it would also help secure your family’s future.
Couples can also take advantage of mobile banking. Nowadays, there are mobile banking features that allows you to create different buckets for each of your saving goals – may it be for the purchase of house, car or future investments. Some banks have enhanced this feature by offering auto-deduction from another savings account to ensure regular deposits.
Credit and debt management
My wife and I treat everything as conjugal, whether it be assets or financial obligations. For example, if my wife had an obligation to a bank prior to our marriage, definitely that would become my obligation as well. This arrangement may not be favorable to some but if a couple would like to settle their personal debts together, banks can surely help.
To pay for it jointly, banks will require you to update the loan contract by including the name of the spouse, thus making the spouses borrowers. Additionally, should the couple face any challenge in paying their debts, banks also have relationship managers who can then arrange more flexible payment terms.
Saving and investments
You can also maximize your savings by opening time deposit accounts, where interest rates can go as much as 5-10% depending on your bank of choice. This is significantly higher compared to the interest earnings in a typical savings deposit account.
Have a financial advisor as your friend in making financial and investment decisions. If you and your partner plan to invest in stocks, government bonds or insurance products, you can always reach out to them.
- Expand your financial literacy
A 2024 study by the Bangko Sentral ng Pilipinas showed that Filipino young adults (aged 18-39) scored the highest in financial literacy. When it comes to spending habits, the study found that young adults are more likely to spend within their income limits, while older age groups tend to exceed their income.
If you or your partner struggles with debt or saving, you can enroll in seminars and have access to various financial education materials. I also believe that financial management should be formally taught as early as high school. Having the essential knowledge and the right mindset could help in developing responsible habits, avoid debt, and be financially ready for the future.
As a bachelor then, I spent a lot of money socializing with friends – Friday night parties, road trips, etc. There was a point when I also got hooked in cryptocurrency-linked investments. Like other aggressive investors, I incurred significant losses in those days when the market was down. There even came a time when it was difficult for me to pay my monthly dues and credit card bills. It was a period of enlightenment, and those experiences made me promise myself that I'll be a wise investor and improve my financial intelligence. From then on, I began to be smart in making investment decisions.
While this happened in the past, it was something I knew I had to share with my wife even before we married. I believe that having an open conversation about you and your partner’s financial standing is critical in the relationship. This way, you can discuss ways to help each other achieve financial stability, both as a couple and as an individual. Practicing honesty can also strengthen the bond and trust in the relationship.
Towards a sweeter financial journey
I consider it an advantage that my wife and I are both accountants. Having the same experience of handling finances in our professional careers has made it easier for us to come up with a plan on utilizing tools for financial forecasting and budgeting. But I don’t necessarily suggest you choose someone who is also in the field of finance. What matters is that you and your partner share the same goals in your relationship and a commitment to honesty and teamwork.
Financial stability is among the things that help in strengthening a relationship as it provides a foundation for security, reduces stress, and promotes trust between partners. When both individuals are financially secure, they can focus on their emotional connection and creating a home for their family rather than worrying about money-related conflicts. Additionally, it helps avoid tensions around issues like debt or unequal contributions, fostering a healthier and more balanced relationship.
As published in The Manila Times, dated 05 February 2025
